Today I finally managed to cancel my Lingo VOIP account. Read on below the fold for all the frustrating details. Short version: Lingo sucks ass.

Okay, so here's the story:

I signed up with the VOIP service Lingo (a Vonage competitor) last year after hearing about it from DanZ and because I generally thought it sounded like a good deal. I tried the service and found the phone call quality to be about on par with a bad cell connection for most calls. I rarely used it and decided to stick with my Verizon line until Burlington Telecom became available to me. I did not cancel my Lingo subscription then because I thought maybe I would use it for some long distance calls or for an office number or something down the road.

Well in August of 2005, I started getting notices from Lingo that they were going to be forced to "suspend (my) account" unless I acknowledged a new 911 statement that the FCC was making them tell their customers. The deadline for account suspension was pushed back to September and the last email I received from them said...

"As of September 20th we have not received your acknowledgment. It is important to respond immediately, as the FCC expects Lingo to suspend any account that has failed to review and accept this acknowledgment after their extended September 28th deadline."

September 28 came and went and I didn't hear anything more from Lingo. I didn't acknowledge the statement because I didn't really care about keeping the service since I wasn't using it.

It turns out, they did not "suspend" anything. About a month ago I received the first email from Lingo since the one I just quoted. It was a friendly notice to customers explaining some updated features of the service. I immediately logged onto the otherwise forgotten account and learned that yes, I had been automatically charged each month since September for the service. I realize that it's my own fault for not being more vigilant about the money that's being taken out of my bank account, but I don't think I'm too nuts for assuming that my account had been suspended since they said they were going to suspend it and then promptly stopped sending me any sort of communication following the threatened suspension date.

So of course as soon as I learned that they had not cancelled the account like they said they would, I attempted to cancel it. First, I spent a good long time searching the Lingo web site for some way to cancel my account. After much frustration and hair-pulling, I picked up the phone and called them, hoping to vent some of my frustration to a CSR and cancel my account at the same time. I selected the option for canceling my account and waited... and waited... Still on the hold line, I sent an email to Lingo customer service:

I have just spent a great deal of time searching your website for some way to cancel my subscription to lingo. There is no online way that I could find. I am now waiting on hold for a customer service rep to pick up and cancel my account. The hold time is ridiculous and I cannot wait any longer. I think it's pretty shady that you don't have an easy way for customers to cancel their accounts.

I also note that according to several emails you sent me last year, my account was due to be suspended by September 28th if I did not acknowledge the 911 service statement. I never did acknowledge the statement, yet I see that I have continued to be billed monthly for service that I am not using. Please explain this to me. In an email dated Sept. 21, 2005, your company wrote:

"As of September 20th we have not received your acknowledgment. It is important to respond immediately, as the FCC expects Lingo to suspend any account that has failed to review and accept this acknowledgment after their extended September 28th deadline."

Why was my account not "suspended" then? Please cancel it immediately and explain to me how you justify continuing to bill the account since September.

Lingo replied with a form letter that apologized and basically said "you can't cancel online, you have to call the phone number." Great. Thanks for the help, now answer the damned phone!

I tried three separate times to cancel my account via telephone by calling the customer service number and selecting "cancel my account" from the menu. The hold times were in excess of 25 minutes each time and I hung up in frustration. Today was attempt number four, and this time I selected "billing questions" instead of "cancel my account" and a CSR picked up within five minutes. Hmm...

I have related this story to Lingo on three separate occasions, once in the email I quoted, once today on the phone with the poor CSR that (fianlly) took my call and lastly today when I filled out their online post-cancellation survey. So far, their response has been piss poor. I'm expressing my frustration here as the only form of protest I can think of. I know it's not their fault that I didn't keep careful track of my own billing history, but it still sucks and their cancellation procedures are shady at best. I hate their breathing guts.